Ways to Stop Fighting Each Other and Start Solving Our Real Problems Together

Change the focus of the discussion. We don't have to buy into the debate the media frames for us, but can hear each others stories and then find what our own real questions and concerns are--and our own good ideas or insights or talents. 

Once are stories are out on the table, we have the choice to move from debating solutions, or even the problem, or trying to convince each other of your answers. Instead, harvest insights from all the differences. Then seek agreement on what the problem is--and all the qualities a possible answer would have to have to count as an acceptable solution. Then see what you can find that could meet these these requirements ("design specs") at least well enough to be acceptable to all.